Insanity OVER... well... for a few days at least :)

I DID IT!!!  I finished the Beach Body Insanity program.  60 days of pure insanity and pain.  I'm excited about my muscle results... but a bit disappointed about my weight loss results.

Why?

Remind me of the name of this blog again?  Oh yeah, right... Confessions of a Diet Breaker.  If I was to write an article for every time I broke diet, well... that would be every day.  Frankly, I'm disappointed because once I realized that month number two gave me an amazing metabolism, I took the liberty of eating whatever I wanted for the first time in my adult life, without any consequences!  

The up side is that it was GREAT to not have to worry about the consequences...  Unfortunately, I didn't get to my idealistic goal weight.  HOWEVER... I am at a happy weight, and my body has never been this defined before, so overall... the results are amazing :)

Looking back...

Shaun T pushed me to extreme limits... and I did it.  I competed against kissy face girl... (You know... the girl with the short dark hair who always has some sort of sexyish look on her face?)  It's like... look at me... you're dripping sweat... and so am I... but... at least I can look sexy at the same time.  (In my best sing-song voice :) 

Seriously?  When I'm dripping sweat... the last thing I want to see is a miss kissy face in front of me, mocking my lack of grace and grimaces as I barely make it off the floor for the umpteenth Insanity jump... lungs ready to explode...  Nope... I'll take the chica with the long blonde hair and pure determination.  Yes... you're the type who inspires me to push to the limit.

Regardless... I'm excited about the results, and proud of myself for pushing through and sticking with it when I really just wanted to quit.  Now, I'm looking forward to repeating the whole process while dragging my hubby through it this time.  And boy... this is going to be FUN!  For once, I'll be able to push HIM to work harder!  LOL  CAN'T WAIT!  (She says with an evil grin on her face...)

Bless me Father, for I have splurged...

If I was back in the confessional, confessing my dietary sins for the past week, it would go something like this... "Bless me Father for I have splurged..." and then I would proceed to regurgitate the following litany of dietary debauchery:

• Chocolate (several Hershey bars I found left over in the freezer after making s'mores)
• Beer (We had an Oktoberfest party with amazingly authentic German beer.  Took a few days to finish off leftovers...).
• Roast  (Saturated and baked in Oktoberfest brew, slow cooked in the oven with potatoes and carrots.  Who can resist that?)
• Pizza (THAT one was FORCED on me by two loving friends who provided dinner for our family on Sunday after staying the weekend...)
• Dr. Pepper (Goes with the pizza...)
• Pumpkin Spice Latte (Same friend insisted on buying me a coffee... how could I refuse???)
• Oh yeah... BURGER & FRIES!  (I hit up TGI Fridays for lunch on Tuesday... something I RARELY do... but the urge was strong, and my friend had a discount card... *sigh*)

Today, I added to that list.  My MIL (Mother-in-Law, who is currently visiting along with my sister-in-law...) asked me if I would make some of my beloved homemade biscotti... so, being the good daughter-in-law that I try to be... I did.  Unfortunately, this loving act instigated a cataclysmic chain of diet-breaking events once again.  *sigh*  

In all sweet honesty, I really was determined NOT to taste a morsel... but as soon as that strong almond smell started wafting from my mixing bowl, I was done for.  From that moment onward, it was one disastrous snitch after another.  

After the biscotti was cut and toasting, I was forced to deal with a ton of crumbs on my cutting board.  And seriously... what's the best way to deal with these crumbs???  Put them on ice cream, OF COURSE!

Needless to say, I sit here, once again wanting to smack myself silly for failing to eat healthy... but so thankful that because I have been faithful to exercise, this last week has not set me back much at all as far as the scale is concerned... maybe that's why I've been so bad???  Argh!!!!!

My new goal is to get through MIL's visit... and then hit the reset button... again.  I am, however, going to endeavor to eat right the next few days.  Then again... isn't that what I always do?  LOL

Making the decision to change.

I wish I was one of those women who have it all together.  You know... the ones who live for their workout and just can't get enough. I've seen those girls.  They are in awesome shape, and they always look perfect!

Nope... that's not me.  I'd be happy to just wake up after sleeping in a bit and make my way to the couch with a cup of coffee and snuggle in with my babies to the latest episode of Dora or Diego.

The problem with this 'dream' is that I want to be fit.  I'm determined to be in shape.  I'm in my 30's, and I don't want to spend the entirety of my 30's feeling like I'll lose the weight... some day.  I'll get into shape... some day.  No.  The time is now.  And I have made the decision.

When that alarm goes off at 6am, and I'm still sore from the previous day and my baby's been up all night crying and fussing, I'm whining like a little girl inside, groaning and dragging myself out of bed.  I hate knowing what's ahead.  And to top it off, when the warm-up exercises start, my muscles are so stiff, it's sheer will-power to make them move beyond a snail's pace.  Being fit is a decision I have to remake over and over again, from the moment I wake up, and throughout every minute of the Insanity workout.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again.  I really don't like to do the Insanity workout.  It's hard.  I feel like cardiac arrest is only seconds away as I feebly go into a plank push-up position and try to look all strong and in control like the rest of the people in the video as they snap themselves from plank to standing with fingers touching their toes in one simple beautiful move.  While they're rocking the moves, I'm barely making it from floor to touching toes using some flapping fish sort of motion, sweat dripping down my nose.  Yeah... the picture of fitness beauty! (Notice the sarcasm there???  LOL)

The upside of it all???  I'm 37 days into Insanity, and starting to feel like I own the world!  For the first time, I have arm muscles that are defined and fun to show off.  (Yes.  I've always been a tomboy.  I like mud and I like showing off muscles... silly... I know...)  I can run up a mountain without dying when I get to the top, and I have the energy to run after five kiddos without feeling completely drained at the end of the day (Just partially drained... five is a LOT!  LOL).

The point is... If you REALLY want to make a change.  YOU CAN!  It's just a decision away.  You decide... How do I want this next year to go?  What will make me happier?  Feel better?  Feel more in control of my life?  I know the answer is different for everyone... but there is an answer out there, and it just requires one simple thing.  A decision.  And sometimes, it's a decision that's remade every minute of the day.

So make your decision to change... and then do it.

Three steps forward, two steps back...

Well... I've made it through the first part of Insanity and the recovery week.  I'd LOVE to say that I've been the poster child for Beach Body, but... alas... my Beach Body diet has been more like a four days on, three days off kind of thing... or even worse... three days on, four days off.  

I think the reason why I'm so bad about sticking to it is that when I do stick with it, I see results FAST!  Then I think... geez... I have some wiggle room now... maybe I will join hubby and the kiddos in those chips and dip or pumpernickel rye bread slathered with butter, paired with a nice amber brew.

That's usually the Friday night scenario, followed by Saturday at the soccer fields, where there's always lunch on the go to think about.  About the quickest thing we can pick up is a burger.  And, c'mon... what's a burger without fries, ketchup and a coke?  (Coke meaning... soda... pop... or whatever the rest of you yanks call it ;)

Come Sunday, I just top it all off with a nice brunch with french toast or pancakes and that real maple syrup my Vermont cousins gifted us... See how easy it is to fall prey to good food???

Regardless, I still consider my results to be FANTASTIC!  I'm down 13 pounds and up a ton of muscle.  Just take a look for yourself.  This is my 34 day before and after pic. (I have to admit, the before pic REALLY embarrasses me now...)

My goal this week is to actually STICK WITH IT!  I want to see the 130's.  So, my goal is to hit 139.9 before my big Oktoberfest party next Saturday.  Because on Saturday... it's no holds barred. I'm German, Irish and French, and take my ethnic background quite seriously.  On St. Patty's day, I feast.  On Oktoberfest, I REALLY feast.  Can't wait for that pumpernickel bread, sauerkraut and all the rest of the yummy goodies that come with the traditional feasting :)

My geek friends are coming early to stay the weekend (and I say geek with pure delight, as I myself fall into that category... and have a mild love affair with Linux) and we're gonna have FUN!

I know I'll have to pay the bill Monday, when I go back to being 'good'... but, I'll just take those next three steps forward, and in the long run... I'll still come out ahead :)

Cheater, Cheater, Chocolate-Raspberry Torte Eater... YUM!

Today is my baby's first birthday.  I'm down over 11 pounds now, and yes, I am celebrating!  This, my friends is what I call a valid reason to cheat :)

We made our absolute favorite for baby's cake... Cook's Illustrated recipe of Chocolate-Raspberry Torte.  And if you've never had it, then you have NEVER had the richest, most indulgent, touch every aspect of your senses, throw you into dreamland, most delectable chocolaty dessert ever!  (Yes... I'm a bit over-enthusiastic about it, but... you just have to taste it to understand.  *sigh*)

Besides... I've already cheated by licking the chocolate off my fingers... off the spoon... off the bowl... off the glass cup measurer... off the floor... (just kidding... 30 second rule doesn't apply to drippy chocolate that has hit the floor... eeew.)  My point is... I've already cheated a bit, so with that curl right in the middle of my forehead... It's time to go all the way ;)

On top of that, we're having a family favorite for dinner.  Tacos!  I'll tone it down a bit by skipping out on the sour cream and skimping on the cheese, but... I don't think I can keep that meal to only 400 calories and give it the full umph it deserves.  Right?

So, happy birthday to my most beautiful Jacq Jacq, and thank's a million, my darling, for the best reason to cheat!

Shaun T... I'm sure you'll reckon with me in the morning ;)

Insanity... "Groan and bear it."

Every morning I get up between 6 and 6:30 am to do my Insanity workout.  I'm grunting and groaning as I drag myself out of bed and force my tired body to stumble down the stairs, make my way into the living room and key up the video of the day while I grab my water.

Thank God that Shaun T isn't one of those annoying exercise video people.  I'll never forget P.E. in high school, when my friend Jackie and I somehow talked our coach into letting us do the Tony Little workouts while everyone else played basketball.  We'd be stretching it out and all the sudden, Tony would say something like... "Imagine me... all alone... with you... in your living room."  EEEEEEEWWWWW!  Um... I don't think so, Tony... But Shaun T?  Well... suffice it to say that I just don't mind spending a little extra quality time with him.  ;)

Too bad that "quality time" is spent with me huffing and puffing and barely making it through... ahem... the warm up.  Oh geez... did I just say the warm up?!?!

Don't judge me, my friends.  At least not until you've tried a little Insanity yourself!  In the last couple of days, I've finally reached the point where I can actually force myself to complete the warm up without stopping.  And I'm so proud of myself!  *smile*  I do have to stop about a million times throughout the rest of the workout.  But, hey!  I'm sweating hard at the end, so I figure I've done my part... and I AM getting better.

The best part?  After only 10 days, I'm 4 ounces shy of losing 10 POUNDS!!!  Yes... Did I say 10 pounds?  I most certainly did!  I just can't wait for what's to come.  My abs are starting to look a lot better, and the rest... well... it's comin' along pretty nicely too :)

On top of everything... I have so much more energy throughout the day.  I'm sleeping better at night.  And... I tend to get more done with the time I have. (Due to my surplus of energy.)

When all is said and done... I might groan and bear it in the morning... but the way I feel the rest of the day makes it all worth it, and gives me the energy I need to repeat the cycle again the next time my alarm goes off.

And to you, cute chick in the front, with the short dark brown hair and chiseled abs... Yeah... I've decided I don't like you just yet.  You're too happy.  You workout too hard.  And you look too good.

That is all :)

Bananas and Peanut Butter... My saving GRACE!

Borrowed from knackfornutrition.com

Following the Insanity plan means that I have to learn a new diet.  This is rather frustrating, because between caring for five kiddos, soccer, my Doula business, and the million other things I do - like clean house... I just don't want to take the time to get to know everything all at once.

One easy meal that I've discovered is an oldie, but goody.  The peanut butter and banana sandwich!

I take Ezekiel bread, Kirkland's natural peanut butter and sliced bananas to make a quick, healthy and yummy lunch in minutes.  In fact, If I just cut that in half, then I'd take care of one of the smaller meals in my five meal plan, and it only takes a couple of minutes to throw it together.  And believe me... with a big active family, time is of the essence.

The picture I use here is borrowed from another website, because I scarfed down my lunch today in my excitement to get the babies to bed and get to work.  But my sandwich had a top and a bottom, and no cinnamon.  Although... I think I will try the cinnamon on my next go-round.

Today I am sore... all over.  Every move is pain.  BUT, I feel really good.  The baby is actually starting to sleep better with my diet change, and I'm getting some awesome nutrition from Shakeology.  I've been feeling happy and energized, and on top of all that... I'm down a couple more pounds!  This is my third day, and weight is dropping fast.

To be honest... I kind of expected the weight to drop fast the first week and a half.  That's normal for me.  The real test will be in a couple of weeks, when it has slowed down a bit.

For now... I'm sore, but excited.  And I know, that although I whine my way through my 6am morning workout... I can do this.  I just keep repeating that mantra.  I can do this.  I can do this!